Recently, I had a close friend, from a long time ago die, right before Christmas. It was shocking to me and I didn’t know how to process it. I didn’t know what to do with it.
Other things in life came up that needed my mental attention, so I put off “dealing” with it and was able to compartmentalize my feelings for a while. When I returned home from traveling, I still wasn’t able to sort through my feelings on her passing, but those feelings were there, in the background waiting to be addressed.
One night, Lisa came to me in a dream. I knew, just KNEW she needed to tell me something. I’m not exactly sure what it was or is yet, but it’s strong and powerful and I’m listening. She was just as I remembered. Vibrant • beautiful • full of life . . .
I woke up knowing she would give anything to be alive again. She has two younger boys that I don’t know much about. You see, our souls were tied together a long time ago. Our souls were CLOSE and we loved each other. She taught me how to enjoy the moment, to listen to a song and feel the words in your soul. She taught me how to be a friend, to always, no matter what … to be there. She taught me how to leave caution to the wind and enjoy life without reservation.
Lisa was bold and large and vibrant and she was sad and lonely and angry. She was a volatile soul who struggled with addiction and anger. I never really knew how difficult her life must have been. She lost her mother young and became the mother figure to her two sisters and a little brother while her father worked and made sure they had a roof over their head and food on the table.
This is my MY perception of her life, I didn’t really KNOW her soul, but we connected in a way that people do. I loved her, but I got to a point in my life where I couldn’t help her. I found that it hurt my heart to watch her change and I couldn’t understand her in the throws of addiction. So I distanced myself, as we do. I remember that being a very difficult decision for me, but one I had to make.
Many years later, we reconnected on Facebook (FB is really great for the connection factor). It was wonderful to hear of the birth of two beautiful boys and a marriage to a childhood friend. We exchanged Christmas cards and “talked” via FB messenger. We exchanged some good healing conversations. It felt good to know she was doing ok.
All this to say, I think Lisa came to me that night to tell me something, to push me to DO something, to help me speak about finding our way spiritually. I believe our non-physical guides are always there. I‘ve asked mine to show me my way and they are answering me. Lisa is surely one of my spiritual guides now and I’m going to continue to listen and see what she has to say.